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Saturday, January 24, 2009

Strengthen your child's relationship Part 2

Step 4: The best way to get your child to tune out is to give them a lecture. Remember that one? Stage your thoughts. You may need to give your advise a little at a time. You will be able to tell when your child is tuning out so be aware of that in your conversations. Either move on to another topic or save it for another time. If the issue needs immediate explanation, you may want to say something like. " I can see your losing interest here. Can I get your reaction now?" Break up the conversation and you will get their attention again. Knowing your child's interest is waning, keep the comments short and to the point.

It is important to give positive comments more than negative ones. There is a 5 to 1 rule on this. Five positives for every negative one. Even negative comments need to be phrased in a tactful and helpful manner. Despite all the positive comments you make, the negative ones seem to stick the most. Sometimes they last a life time. Be careful of what you say. Go back to step 4. Think before you speak. Especially if you are going to make an assumption.

Step 5: Once you get a good, stable and solid communication going, stick to it. The whole idea of this article is to get you to establish a level of communication where your child respects you enough to listen. You loose that communication when they start to argue or get angry with you and you do the same thing back. Yes, it is easier said than done. However, this is the most crucial point in any relationship. It is something you must work at. Perhaps one step at a time.

Step 6: One of the major issues we face as parents is getting the message across about education. It was good that we all loved school so much, wasn't it? Remembering how your child may feel about school, work with your teacher more than your student. When you know what they need to be doing in school and for school work, it is a lot easier to state the facts and let them know that you are up on their assignments. The hassles parents face getting their children to become A students is the number one relationship destroyer. If you have a hard time helping your student with school work, consider using a tutor. You can even locate a good one on line. There are programs on the Internet that have tutors who will help your child on line, at home. This is a safe and convenient way to eliminate a huge relationship issue so you can concentrate on the task of establishing a better relationship.

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