Marital Boredom

Don't you find that people can fall out over some of the stupidest things in life? Common marriage problems can be just the same, if only couples could step back and see their marriage problems from the outside they would often realise that they really don't have a serious problem at all.

One common marriage problem that regularly pops up is 'I'm bored'. OK, so you're bored does that mean you should jump ship or take positive action? So you want to jump ship? Why? What's making you bored? Why are you bored now and not at the start? It's common for people to get cold feet after a while, especially when the honeymoon period is over and you have to get on with living but do you honestly want to spend your life running from marriage problems, continually chasing the next honeymoon period which will come to an end just like the last one?

There are very few common marriage problems that, with a little effort, can't be fixed and boredom is no different. Separation isn't the only, nor often the best answer to marital boredom. Quite often boredom isn't about the marriage it's about you!



If only Jen and Brad were here and it's free! -
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People are different and opposites attract so it's common for couples to have different desires and aspirations but running isn't generally the answer. How many people do you see jumping from one job to another and one marriage to another without ever achieving what they set out to achieve. Boredom is a common problem, not just in marriage but in life generally. Marriage problems, work problems, it doesn't matter if you don't know what you are looking for you'll never achieve it.

Boredom can't be resolved by running, searching for something you never find and probably doesn't actually exist. If you want a life that isn't boring then you need to understand what you want and work towards achieving it. Is it really the marriage that's the problem? It's common for boredom to be driven from the way you perceive your marriage and treat your marriage not from what your marriage actually is. Most of us can achieve our goal's married or unmarried, if you really love your partner but also want to change your life you'll find a way to achieve your dreams without throwing away your love.



Marriage is a partnership that needs to be worked at, it's not always easy but then if it was wouldn't life be boring!! Boredom is like all common marriage problems, you can take what seems to be the easy way out, which many people live to regret, or you can take the positive, proactive, more fulfilling approach to marriage problems and end up with a marriage that truly is like the joining of two halves.

Boredom is a state of mind and how you resolve it is down to you but before ripping your marriage apart I urge you to consider what you decide to do next very carefully. Marriage shouldn't be seen as a chain around your neck. Like many common marriage problems marriage is seen as the catalyst for boredom without really considering the driving cause. Marriage doesn't need to be boring, your marriage doesn't need to be boring but whether or not you heed my advice and take a positive approach to your marriage problems is down to you.

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Talk to your WIFE!

Help for Relationships

Financial concerns or difficulties can cause a great deal of stress in a marriage. It is important to do your best to ensure that you do not allow your financial situation to destroy your marriage especially in these times of economic struggles. There are countless reports of derange husbands going off killing his whole family because they just lost there jobs. These are just too sad and could have been avoided.

When financial concerns come up it is important to discuss the problems so that both partners are aware of what is going on and to work on establishing a budget together. Working together on this issue will make sure that neither partner feels left out of the decision making process and neither partner bears the stress of worrying about finances on their own.

Sharing household responsibilities with each other is another secret to a happy marriage. If either partner feels as though they are taking on too much responsibility in the household it can lead to resentment. Not only does sharing these responsibilities prevent resentment but it also gives the couple an opportunity to work as a team which strengthens their bond. Both partners need to take an active role in completing household chores and let their partner know if they are beginning to feel overburdened. Never make your partner feel like a certain job is always their responsibility.



Open and honest communication is also necessary for a happy marriage. Without communication the relationship will continually struggle. It's important to be honest with your partner and share your concern and to listen to what your partner has to say and make an effort to understand their point of view. Communicating about problems and concerns is important but it's also important to communicate about your aspirations and even your daily lives. All of these types of communication bring a couple closer together and foster a happy marriage. Don't shut your partner out.

Along the lines of open communication, it's also important that you let your partner know if they have said or done some thing to hurt you. Failure to do so will allow the problem to continue to cause problems in the marriage. If you bottle up your feelings your partner will be unaware of what they have done to hurt you and may be likely to repeat their actions. You also may begin to avoid your partner because you are angry and you don't want to start a confrontation. Your partner in turn may sense you behaving differently and be annoyed by your behavior. Simply coming out and telling your partner why you are upset can help you avoid this unnecessary host of problems.

Understanding that you and your partner won't always be in complete agreement is also critical to a happy marriage. While you may agree on a lot of things it's unrealistic to believe that you and your partner will be in sync at all times. It's okay to disagree sometimes as long as you respect each other's feelings and beliefs and do not think that any one disagreement will be the end of the relationship.

Spontaneity is also an important part of a happy marriage. Allowing yourselves to fall into a predictable pattern can lead to boredom but being spontaneous at times will prevent boredom from setting in and keep the relationship interesting. Be spontaneous, go out and get a new negligee or some other lingerie item for yourself if you are a woman, if you are a husband reading this, go get something for your wife!



Finally, remembering why you married your spouse is one of the most important secrets of a happy marriage. Always remembering what it is about your partner that drew you to them will make certain that you never forget your love for your partner. It will also ensure that they are always beautiful in your eyes. Many things may change throughout the course of your marriage but the one thing that will always remain is the reason you fell in love in the first place.

A happy marriage is not guaranteed no matter how much the partners love each other. There are so many variables that can have an affect on the happiness and success of the marriage. It is important that both partners realize that they must continuously work on all of these aspects if they want their marriage to remain a happy and healthy relationship.

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Marriages are crumbling in America

Marriages are crumbling in America. There are many reasons why marriages are failing and it would be impossible to name all of those reasons here. Times are changing and people's concept of marriage has changed. Some people are waking up to the fact that they were probably better off single. Some chose an incompatible mate but chose to have a family and stayed with their mates. Many people chose to be married but live separate lives. Whatever the case, marriages are definitely on the rocks.

The family unit is giving into the pressures of society as far as how relationships are. On television, most families are characterized as being schizophrenic, sex crazed or having serious problems with extended family members. This has an effect on American society in which television has distorted what the family should be striving for which is an element of understanding, harmony or peace.

What has really did damage to marriages is the fact that parts of the civilized world has defined marriage as the woman wanting to be secure (home, possessions and security) while the man provides these things. Women are waking up and providing these things for themselves, making decisions for them, which according to patriarchal rules, is a no-no. So most women are choosing to be single and most men are not committing because of various factors. Society is changing as far as marriage is concerned.

Most marriages are breaking up because of not understanding the purpose of the other individual. People want to expand their horizons of self worth within marriage and because of traditional rules that were made up to keep relationships subject able, many people are escaping that mentality of slavery in any kind of relationship.

So if you are married, there are several things that you must do to create an atmosphere of harmony between you and your spouse and here are some of those elements to make your marriage a happy marriage.

1. Create a portal in which your mate can explore her/his real life passion.

This is very important. Even within a marriage, each person is an individual. You should help your mate accomplish their individual goals.

2. Give your mate plenty of room to grow and experience life.

Just because you are married does not mean that it has to turn into a prison. Let your mate do the things that they need to do to make them happy.

3. Make sure that your mate has significant time to themselves to think about their life purpose.

This is important. Everyone needs a time for reflection so provide your mate with those private times that he/she needs to get their mental and spiritual thoughts together.



Marriage and Family Counseling - Really Important!

Marriage and Family Counseling is important. Marriage and Family counselors help couples work out their problems to develop a system of love, trust and oneness in a relationship. Counselors can dig and see the root cause of the problem and recommend a solution for the ills and challenges of the couple or family. Marriage and family counselors are mental health professionals who bring a family perspective to a person, couple or organization. They treat families, mental, emotional and various health and behavior problems.

If you have children, it is great to have them as a part of the program since they are a part of the family. Marriage counseling considers peripheral characters, such as the Mother-in-Law, Father-In-Law, other relatives and the effects that they have on the marriage. This is accomplished via personality interviews with extended family members.

Marriage counseling brings out controversial issues. It could be some elements of a spouse's past that are hidden which affect the relationship deeply. Many of these issues can stop a marriage cold, such as incest, rape of a relative and abuse in a previous marriage. When problems like this occur, marriage therapy is truly needed to solve the problem. If your mate agrees, then this is one way to improve your marriage or else, the misery will continue.



Creating Fields of Love with Marriage

Many married couples are always confrontational because they can not forgive and forget. Some couples never recover from the problems in a relationship but choose to stay the course while being totally miserable with the choices that they made. They stop romancing each other and doing the things that allowed the relationship to flourish in the first place.

If you seek the professional help of a marriage counselor, they can provide a battery of tests and evaluate to study, comprehend and obtain new solutions for helping couples in their marriage. Most individuals resign themselves to live under a roof of controversy and loudness. This is detrimental to people who have families. Counseling is great and can heal the wounds of a person, family or extended family. Counseling can focus on brief, solution-focused, family-centered treatment which is center towards the cause of problems in your marriage instead of the symptoms. If you are married, you might want to consider this kind of treatment to resolve your problems.

Recognizing Certain Problems in Marriages

These issues are widely known to cause problems in marriages:

- Families facing severe mental illnesses and emotional disorders, such as schizophrenia and depression.

Many marriages have to take on the extra responsibility of a loved one or parent coming down with an illness. Sometimes, this causes pressure on one or both people in the relationship and can be financially taxing. The trend is to put that person in a nursing home or facility that can treat their disorder but a married couple can turn these kinds of situations into gold if they plan correctly and realize that not all is bad. This could actually enhance and help the marriage if looked at from a proper perspective.

Marriage can be a good deal if you really work at respecting each other and love each others purpose.

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Even if you don't have marital problem - Good to tune up

The role of marriage counselors is a highly important one in the terms of helping families work out their problems and stay together. For the children of a couple in disarray, it can be very stressful to be in a family where the parents are fighting. I was in one myself. My parents used to argue and fight just about anything. The marriage expert acts like a referee who comes in to settle the disputes and get everyone working together again. They help the children of the family by helping the parents become friends and soul mates once again.

Defined simply, marriage counselors are trained qualified professionals that will provide treatment and help to heal a person, or a couple, in order to resolve the outstanding conflicts that exist between them.

Many feel that marriage has slowly eroded over the years when compared to the relatively low divorce rates of previous decades. However, it should be noted that in those days couples stayed together no matter what, most often for the children because divorce was frowned upon. However, these days things are much more open and divorce is used more often now as a means to split up two people who can no longer spend time together. Whether it is because couples both have busy and stressful lives that slowly cause them to drift apart, or if there are other reasons for the marriage difficulty, the professionals are there to provide help to both parties.

If you are suffering through marriage difficulties at the moment, then there may be a need for professional relationship help. Through counseling and therapy, the relationship professionals will be able to offer marriage advice to help you and your spouse work things out. Rather than simply go for the easy route of the divorce, you can talk with a relationship expert, get relationship advice and marriage counseling to work things out.



When you decide to find a marriage therapist, you should make sure that you find a licensed marriage family therapist. The reason that you want to have someone who is licensed in family and marriage therapy is because the therapy not only is needed for you and your spouse, but the children as well. The therapist needs to be a licensed professional who can counsel the children, you and your friends through these difficult times. When your family and friends see that your marriage is hitting a rocky patch, they become worried and they begin to feel stress over the whole situation. With marriage counseling, those stresses and problems can be repaired for the exterior individuals of your marriage.

Another main reason why you will want to try and find licensed marriage counselors and licensed family therapists is because they will cost money, and that means you will end up paying out of pocket if you don't get a marriage family therapist that is licensed. Licensed marriage counselors and therapists are usually covered by insurance, and that means one less stress in your mind during the trying period of marriage instability.

Another thing that you might need to consider when you are getting relationship advice from marriage counselors is that you are okay with their sex and cultural background. This may be an odd thing to think of for your marriage expert, but if you are more comfortable with a marriage counselor that is male, you are going to be more open to repairing the relationship. On that same note, you should make sure that you choose a gender that is going to work for both you and your spouse. The same goes for the cultural backgrounds of marriage counselors.



Marriage is all about cooperation, and it only works if everyone is on board and going in the right direction. Between you, your spouse, the kids, your extended family and even your friends, everyone needs to be on board. This is where marriage counselors come in and that is the biggest thing to understand about the role of marriage counseling. They are there to get everyone on the same page and working together again.

If you are visiting a marriage expert and you are still in the me and them mentality, it is not going to work. You have to be open; you have to be honest because the relationship expert can only create solutions to the problems you face by what you tell them. If you lie, the solutions will fail and the marriage most likely will fail with it.

Taking the steps towards marriage counseling and marriage family therapy means that you and your spouse have reached the point where you know that something needs to be fixed and something needs to change. You are already halfway there, and undertaking marriage counseling can get you the rest of the way to the marriage you used to have.


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