Thursday, April 16, 2009
The role of marriage counselors is a highly important one in the terms of helping families work out their problems and stay together. For the children of a couple in disarray, it can be very stressful to be in a family where the parents are fighting. I was in one myself. My parents used to argue and fight just about anything. The marriage expert acts like a referee who comes in to settle the disputes and get everyone working together again. They help the children of the family by helping the parents become friends and soul mates once again.
Defined simply, marriage counselors are trained qualified professionals that will provide treatment and help to heal a person, or a couple, in order to resolve the outstanding conflicts that exist between them.
Many feel that marriage has slowly eroded over the years when compared to the relatively low divorce rates of previous decades. However, it should be noted that in those days couples stayed together no matter what, most often for the children because divorce was frowned upon. However, these days things are much more open and divorce is used more often now as a means to split up two people who can no longer spend time together. Whether it is because couples both have busy and stressful lives that slowly cause them to drift apart, or if there are other reasons for the marriage difficulty, the professionals are there to provide help to both parties.
If you are suffering through marriage difficulties at the moment, then there may be a need for professional relationship help. Through counseling and therapy, the relationship professionals will be able to offer marriage advice to help you and your spouse work things out. Rather than simply go for the easy route of the divorce, you can talk with a relationship expert, get relationship advice and marriage counseling to work things out.
When you decide to find a marriage therapist, you should make sure that you find a licensed marriage family therapist. The reason that you want to have someone who is licensed in family and marriage therapy is because the therapy not only is needed for you and your spouse, but the children as well. The therapist needs to be a licensed professional who can counsel the children, you and your friends through these difficult times. When your family and friends see that your marriage is hitting a rocky patch, they become worried and they begin to feel stress over the whole situation. With marriage counseling, those stresses and problems can be repaired for the exterior individuals of your marriage.
Another main reason why you will want to try and find licensed marriage counselors and licensed family therapists is because they will cost money, and that means you will end up paying out of pocket if you don't get a marriage family therapist that is licensed. Licensed marriage counselors and therapists are usually covered by insurance, and that means one less stress in your mind during the trying period of marriage instability.
Another thing that you might need to consider when you are getting relationship advice from marriage counselors is that you are okay with their sex and cultural background. This may be an odd thing to think of for your marriage expert, but if you are more comfortable with a marriage counselor that is male, you are going to be more open to repairing the relationship. On that same note, you should make sure that you choose a gender that is going to work for both you and your spouse. The same goes for the cultural backgrounds of marriage counselors.
Marriage is all about cooperation, and it only works if everyone is on board and going in the right direction. Between you, your spouse, the kids, your extended family and even your friends, everyone needs to be on board. This is where marriage counselors come in and that is the biggest thing to understand about the role of marriage counseling. They are there to get everyone on the same page and working together again.
If you are visiting a marriage expert and you are still in the me and them mentality, it is not going to work. You have to be open; you have to be honest because the relationship expert can only create solutions to the problems you face by what you tell them. If you lie, the solutions will fail and the marriage most likely will fail with it.
Taking the steps towards marriage counseling and marriage family therapy means that you and your spouse have reached the point where you know that something needs to be fixed and something needs to change. You are already halfway there, and undertaking marriage counseling can get you the rest of the way to the marriage you used to have.